I just switched off my lights, the cat's at the foot of the bed, snugly curled up into a furball; The darkness is denting my eyeballs and the silence is ringing in my ears; I hear the occasional cars passing the highway just outside my window, across the backyard and over the fence, and the recurrent dripping of water from the shower is beginning to form the chords of a lullaby... The seeming peacefulness is forcing me to address my thoughts - The occasional whiff of cat litter distracts me but it's not enough.

It's not that I'm not over you, it's not that I still miss you but it's just that I don't know if I'll ever be completely healed cause somethings still lead back to you. I'm good, my life's good and I'm happier than I can ever be in the last one year or so but I'm also jaded. Even if I liked someone, I don't know if I can ever bring myself to walk through another journey, which you've proved, may not even have a destination.


So, you'll never know cause I don't want you to know, cause you can't know, cause I don't even think you wanna know. Sitting around waiting for things to happen won't happen cause no one, not even I, ever thought it will happen, cause it's probably better if nothing happens. I can't even say when, how, why or what to begin with and if it were a story, I wouldn't know where to start.
I hope it isn't true but yet sometimes I wish you knew...

The cat's bells are jingling. I think I woke her up with my excessive fidgeting... I tried to hold her in my arms and coax her back to sleep but she doesn't like to be held, unlike me. I don't like spaces; I like being part of a clutter. Spaces make me feel vunerable and tonight I've too much space... And it's on nights like these that I wish you form the clutter on my bed...
No, not you but you... If you know what I mean.

On another note, I watched the Secret Diary of a Call Girl Tv series premiere just now and liked it! Too many nice shows these days plus my HK drama addiction that's taking me away from my assignment schedule.
Note to self: No more procrastination and work due in FIVE days!!!
I've been relaxing and having too much fun for my own good but then again, I've been going to school, which is a nice change from last sem. I deserve a white chip cookie! HA HA. (:

p.s. imissmybff ):


PEACE.

backstreetgirls

backstreetboys

<3

More pics next time! (:
x o x o